unspoken fears as a first time Mum

February 10, 2013 at 9:02 pm 1 comment

“Fear is contagious. You can catch it.
Sometimes all it takes is for someone to say that they’re scared for the fear to become real. Mo was terrified, and now Nick was too. ”  
– Neil Gaiman
18-3-12 - E sleeping on first visit to allotment 4B
There are few things more beautiful than the sight of a sleeping baby.
This evening I held Euan in my arms long after he’d fallen asleep. Watching his chest rise peacefully up and down, milky lips parted in a sleepy smile, fingers outstretched across my heart. I wish I could freeze time and live in this moment for ever I think to myself sometimes. But that would mean no clapping, bashing, climbing, splashing, singing and chatting (not to mention funny hat wearing) – all things that elicit the most amazing smiles, laughter and squeals of delight…
25-1-13 - in furry hat 4B…funny things that make my heart brim full and leave no space for the fear you daren’t speak of as a parent. The agonising, contagious fear of ‘what if …‘ that surfaces each time tragedy strikes someone else’s family. So this evening as I hugged E even tighter I was sparing a thought for the families of 15 month old Patrick who died suddenly in his sleep yesterday and 2 year old Charlie who lost his fight with Leukaemia. There are no words for such heartbreaking news.baby quote

I wanted to share details of a couple of charities set up by bereaved parents to ensure something meaningful comes from the tragic loss of their child.

Reuben’s Retreat, in memory of 23 month old Reuben who died suddenly from a brain tumour last summer, provides support and respite breaks to families facing the serious illness or loss of a child.

Millie’s Trust, in memory of 9 month old Millie who died after a choking incident at nursery, providing free first aid courses for parents and carers.

You can read more about Reuben and Millie here and if you wish to donate to support their work with families you can do so here and here.

Entry filed under: home life.

now we are 3 {Me and Mine – January} swing happy

1 Comment Add your own

  • 1. Johanna GGG  |  March 1, 2013 at 12:55 pm

    A really beautiful reflection. I often feel very lucky to have sylvia with us. Life can be very cruel and random. These charities are brilliant that give comfort to those in hard times.


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About Nip it in the bud

Welcome to my blog about growing and cooking allotment veg since 2009 and growing sweet boys since 2012. Take a walk with us through our life in Gloucester with a boy, a baby and 3 cats.

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I love how an ordinary moment frozen in time by the camera can actually reveal so much. Luca is all about inhabiting his body and jumping, running and climbing. Euan is all about the quirkiness, curiosity and inventions. There's more about these best friend brothers on the blog in this month's #siblingsproject post #gloucesterlife #nipitinthebudblog
This little one is negotiating hard to get out of food shopping with me. Even saying that poor Daddy will be hungry if we don't restock the fridge isn't working. Apparently Daddy will be fine eating a wooden mushroom while L watches telly! #gloucesterlife #nipitinthebudblog #toddlerantics💜
#mischiefmakers #summerreadingchallenge starts today - you can find out more at your local library. E was excited to sign up and work towards earning his medal. There are some great activities taking place in Gloucestershire libraries this summer. #welovereadingbooks #gloucesterlife #nipitinthebudblog
I'd love a packet of crisps the size of a pillow case to make the same toddler-to-Doritos bag ratio. #gloucesterlife #nipitinthebudblog #toddlerliferocks
Love Saturday mornings. E's busy creating already with @geomagworld #gloucesterlife #nipitinthebudblog
Beach buddies #lightroomstoriescontest #adobelightroom #bestfriendbrothers #nipitinthebudblog
Happy memories of our Cornwall break last month at the start of this super sunny heatwave season. #lightroomstoriescontest #adobelightroom #nipitinthebudblog
Our first "soaked on the school run" selfie in a long long time! So many smiles and "yay, it's raining" from everyone in the playground ☔😄 #gloucesterlife #nipitinthebudblog
I think Luca was channelling his inner Monet when he painted his duck money box #2yearoldartist #gloucesterlife #nipitinthebudblog
I love finding pictures on my phone I'd forgotten about that remind me of a really special time with my boys (the Project Pilgrim celebration at @GlosCathedral a couple of weeks ago) #gloucesterlife #nipitinthebudblog
Love this kids creativity - there's only so many times you can tolerate your little brother interrupting your game of giant Connect 4 after all! #gloucesterlife #nipitinthebudblog
L fell asleep in the car today and stayed asleep when I got him out. I took this picture thinking I'd savour the moment and then wake him so that bedtime wouldn't be messy but just look at that face, I couldn't. So I enjoyed the cuddle instead and he's now snoring blissfully beside me again. Trust your baby, he knows what he needs 😴 #gloucesterlife #nipitinthebudblog

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